“A fighting match? That’s when you hit each other really hard. And run after each other. And try to scratch the other one.”
This is what my son tells me. I’m not sure how we got here, but somehow he ended up talking about a fighting match. We’re in the car, and I tend to pay attention to traffic and the road, so I missed some of the story leading up to this. The term fighting match triggers something in me, that makes me want to dig a little deeper.
We do our best with Big Boy O and ReBelle to raise them to be kind people. They are quite courteous, polite and in general very sweet. I really love it that bullying is so strongly rejected and battled with all sorts of behaviour and protocols these days in schools. It’s really good. It makes me feel deep shame of the bullying I did as a kid. I don’t think I was that bad, but I did not stop bullying when I saw it. I rather joined in to protect my own position in the group. I would do that very differently, now. There’s enough animosity in the world, we really don’t need more. Especially not for our kids.
So, when the fighting match comes up, I wonder. And I ask: is there a hugging match as well?
My son is very convinced: no, there is no such thing. I can’t come up with anything as well.
Sad, really. Why don’t we have a hugging match? Or something similar. Maybe we should do just that this week. Be nice to people. Help others. Be kind. Reach out. Love.
Because when we do, there’s no loser.
It’s a match in which we will all win.
Are you in?